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Friday, July 18, 2014

Opportunity Wasted In An Overdose

Am I supposed to feel sorry for the young person who overdosed after doctors spend hours and hours getting his bad leg straight again (basically making him a new hip and thigh)?  A surgery that cost tens of thousands of dollars so, with work and healing, he could walk normally again, eventually being able to hike or cycle and live a normal life?  Why am I pissed?

Why am I pissed after watching my spousal unit suffer daily from chronic pain, lack of free mobility, going through two knee replacements and two back fusions and yet he still keeps moving ahead?  Why do I feel this kid was a selfish brat because he couldn't suck it up for a while and deal with the pain of his surgery and rehab? We knew this kid; he occasionally would come and hang out while the others painted and scrapped our house.

I bet the medical team is wondering why they bothered when there are people in need of the same kind of surgery that would pony up and put up with it all. Not only did this kid kill himself and rip his mother's heart out, he wasted a fantastic opportunity.

Why are we supposed to feel compassion for the drug addict who won't get help, who won't work a program or who won't say, "Enough is enough.  I'm getting off this ride?" I've known young and old people who just "do it."  I met one recently and I think of him daily with affection, respect and prayers of support for his continuing recovery.
Why is it that the only people I feel sorry for are the families of addicts; the people who put their lives, hearts, health, pocketbooks, houses on the line?  The families that never go on vacation, that neglect other family members, that go broke (or worse into serious debt), that have to get their family member arrested; THOSE are people I feel sorry for.

Can I pray for the addict?  Sure.  But I can't seem to get up one ounce of compassionate feeling. All my compassion goes to his family. I'm tired of the selfishness and self-absorption of addicts.

Why is the only person I feel heart-broken for is his poor mother who poured her heart, soul, time, money, energy into this kid?  I feel devastated for her; that's her kid, her baby. She has to walk forward in life, one faltering footstep at a time.  He's out of pain. He's free.  All the rest of his family and friends are left to wonder why, especially when given such an opportunity to recover and live a normal life, would he make that conscious choice to use?  The women will be weeping and the men will be pissed. All I can come up with is "his poor mother!"

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