You Want To Be A...WHAT???

My niece has decided she wants to be a Doula. OK, cool. (Insert Supportive Aunt here) She'll be great, I'm sure.

Wait, hang on. A...WHAT?

I had to read her Blog to even get a remote idea of what the hell-en-hiemer a Doula is. I even had to Google the d**n thing. Here is what good ol' Wikipedia says:

Doula is a word that has most closely become associated with a woman who provides non-medical support during labour and birth, and also the postpartum period. The term can also be used to describe other supportive roles for other life events such as abortion, death and more.

Gotcha. Right.

The things I learn. Never-ending.

However, it doesn't do me a whole hellofalotta lot of good....I'm passed the age and I'm spayed.

So yes, call me selfish but I need a massage! (My niece is a licensed masseuse and is awesome! Why must she live 2,000 miles away. Boo-hoo!)

It sure is a career you can take anywhere you go! But why the heck is it called "Doula?"

Whatsa'matter with Midwife? Now you say "Midwifery" and yes, I know what that is! A time-honored tradition, good work, almost holy work if you will.

Guess I'm an old fart but if you say "Doula" to me, I'm thinking it's

1) some kind of weird Celtic instrument (Insert Irish Accent here: "Sweet Mary and Joseph, tha' lad plays a mean Doula!")

2) a dish you cook in a sheep stomach (Insert Scots accent here: "Och, ta hell with haggis! Aye, na' gi' me a plat of Doula -- na tha's grand stuff!")

Or

3) some kind of Greek Dance. (Insert drunken Tourist accent here: "Ouzo and Doula, ooh-pah!")

My niece's name begins with a "D" so yes, it kind of goes together. D_____ The Doula. Kind of like a kids' book title!

Oh, God.

I really need to stop hanging around Marty. My brain is warping....

She'll be great, I'm sure! Now, if I can only stop giggling.