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Monday, March 5, 2012

At the Yeast, I'm Depressed!

Crappy Bread - 162 (yet again). Me - 0

Doesn't matter if I make it by hand with a friggin' wooden spoon, with a mixer with dough hooks, a Cuisinart, a Kitchen Aid, or even a Bread Machine.

Doesn't matter how many videos I watch or probably how many classes I'd take.
It doesn't matter if it's your grandmother's never-fail recipe that even your idiot aunt can use, it'll be a colossal screw up.

I have given away 2 bread nachines in my lifetime....why bother having them? Waste of space. Shitty, horrible bread from bread machines! Door stops!

If it has the word "yeast" anywhere NEAR the recipe, it will be a colossal failure. That's bread, biscuits, rolls, etc.

If the word "dough" is in the recipe, it will most likely be a colossal failure. As in Pie Dough. As in Pizza Dough. If I use refrigerated pie crust, sometimes it sort of turns out. But not all the time. I almost screw up crescent rolls unless they are actually formed into CRESCENT rolls and not something you CREATE with crescent rolls.

This may seen like it's absolutely nothing in the great scheme of things, but right now, it's huge. I cannot call myself a good cook until I can jump this hurdle.

Oh, and another reason why I'm in such a jolly friggin' mood.....

If my dogs don't get their Canine Good Citizen certificates, I will be a failure. No way around that one.

And I cannot figure out how to make the color in Photoshop 7 on Windows 7 little blocks of color instead of that stupid, asinine color wheel, which means if I can't figure out a way to easily identify colors, I'll have to use my old laptop to do anything major in PS7.

And Yoga is kicking my ass. I'm weak as an over-cooked noodle and I hate feeling this way.

Back to being mediocre, feeling old and very, very depressed.

1 comment:

  1. Poor Mia. We all still love you and know you can overcome your hurdles. You have to be amazing or else the JBOL would not love you so very mucho. Be depressed, cry, throw a tantrum... today. Tomorrow is new and DO NOT give up. Cause we all know you're awesome that way.