Re-evaluating Training

Bath time today for my hairy beasts. They are blowing coat like it's their job!  I know everyone's dogs are!  It's a crazy year for shedding dogs.

I miss my two old cattledogs, Wingie and Jesse Ann. You could vacuum them.  Jesse would attach the vacuum and the lawn mower!

Now we have to work on "the vacuum is not evil." Elke is better at this than Artie...but she had been vacuumed when I had the other two older dogs. Artie doesn't want ANYTHING to do with the evil vacuum. So we're going to leave it in the den (dogs' room) and turn it on every day while Evil Vacuum dispenses treats. This is totally do-able but I admittedly should have started this whole grooming thing when Art was a wee lad!  Lazy owner.

I had a really good long talk with my Mastiff friend about training.  She's been working with dogs all her life (has Ch. CGC, Therapy, CDs on most of her dogs; all have Ch. and therapy certs.). She threw out the idea that when I was throwing treats when Artie was getting all honked off over Jimmy( the cat) being out there, that I was probably rewarding the behavior I didn't want.

This was a really good discussion and one I really think I needed to have. I've been pretty much surrounded by AP trainers and while THEY get the whole  "treat the dog when he's throwing himself at the door like a total asshole", I just don't get it. I couldn't wrap my head around it.  I have a lot of respect for Molly Mastiff; she really knows her stuff. She is a PR trainer but when she has to yell at her dogs or give a correction, she does it.

This is the way I learned years ago and I'm wondering how "wrong" it was. My dogs in the past were pretty well behaved, learned training quickly and were happy to work.

She suggested, and this is kind of old school, to give him a verbal negative (if he's not completely over the top) and the minute he turns to me, reward him. THIS make sense to me.  It's kind of what my old trainer, Pat Piazza, would have done.  The method of throwing treats while they were in high honk waiting for them to de-escalate, didn't make any sense to me at all.  I couldn't wrap my head around it.  She speculated that by working with Artie the "newer" way, it might have caused him to escalate when he got out and went after Jimmy.  

She also said, and I found this interesting, that since Elke starts it with a grumble which causes Artie to get all weird, that Elke decides to like Artie "take care of it."  She's NOT a leader-type dog.  Neither is he, I don't think.

We're also working on Mr. Artie NOT being focused on the French doors. and re-learning "go lay down." Kind of doing it the "old fashioned" way:" an "acckkkk" when you're being stupid, treats and praise when you do what I want. I am not always walking around with treat hanging out my bra, for God's sake. Praise works too WHEN they are calm.

And we're working on not charging the damn door. I'm tired of that too.
 I am tired of my dogs being arse-holes.  Time to grow up!

Awful Artie

I just had this horrible, awful thing happen.

When did my dear, sweet Artie Bloo turn into an utter arse-hole?  I've always been able to take this dog anywhere; dog parks, hikes, over-nights with other dogs.

I am beyond upset.  I'm still shaking.

I f----g hate squirrels, I f---g hate cats who think my backyard is their highway.  I don't think training can help this situation.

Damn-damn-damn that stupid den door for not closing.  (The dogs are in the den; that's their hang-out place.)

Artie marched through the kitchen and right into the basement to help himself to the damn cat food.  Jimmy the cat (we're babysitting him) came from the second floor down to the first out of curiosity.  He was just curious, "What going on?" I was calling Artie to come upstairs from the basement and they spotted each other.   Artie whipped around and went from him.  Jimmy is pretty fast but Artie was really going for him.  This was not playing or chasing; this was I'm going to kill you.  I managed to chase him downstairs to the basement as he was going after the cat.

I am ashamed to say it but I had to wack him with my leather folder (which for some odd reason I had in my hand) to get him off the cat.  It was f-----g awful

 The cat is OK, I checked him.  But if anything had happened to him, I would have been devastated.  I also probably would have put Artie down. I just can't have a cat killer.  It's unacceptable.  I have 2 old cats.

Luckily (Thank God) nobody or any animal was hurt, but I am just absolutely shattered. .I've been trying so hard with him and it all just blew up.   He's been kind of grumpy with other dogs lately.  That stupid year of cancer and recovery has really taken its toll.

It's kind of my fault for not working harder when he and Elke were younger to integrate them with the cats.  He's 4 now so I imagine this isn't fixable.

There aren't a lot of people I can tell this to.  My all-positive trainer friends would be livid if they knew I damned near wacked Artie into next year.

I just hope the cat isn't traumatized. In his new there are dogs.  I have these horrible visions of Jimmy being super afraid of dogs now and him coming back to us for fostering.

(Insert a big string of swear words here.)   I think I need a drink and a cigarette.  This is NOT a good day to quit.  I have to calm down. I have rehearsal tonight.

Artie Goes For A Walk In The Woods

Artie Bloo says: Our Uncle Terry took me and mom out for a car ride and a walk in The Ledges.

I got to eat French Fries!

Most of the time, I just dragged my leash.  There were two dogs and I got pretty excited and weird about that.  Mom left the fries in the car.  She should have brought them.

We had fun, even though I had to stick around while they took pictures.

Sometimes Mom leaned on my back so she could get down from steep places.  "Help, Mom," she'd say!

Uncle Terry was surprised that I stuck around so good.  Except for chasing that chipmunk.  But I came back when Mom called.

There was no swimming at this place.  Bummer!

Mom said I was a good boy!  But I REALLY need to get out more!! Thank you Uncle Terry for letting me go with you.

And I didn't puke in the car either!

Elke says: They left me at home.

Artie at Bark In The Park, May 2015

Took Artie to our local Humane Society's doggie event, Bark in the Park yesterday.

He started out being grumbly with other dogs (had to get after him a bit), but once he had a swim and a poop, he was fine.  He did really well with people of all ages; he didn't even flinch at a wheelchair.

He needs to get out more; you can tell he needs a little brush-up work!  All these months of not taking him out and about are showing.  I had to scold him a few times and re-direct him a few times.

Since when does he think he's a big. old, bad Cattledog jerk-off?

Why Have A Dog That.....?

Is it just me or am I crazy?

Why in the world would you have a dog that had to be heavily monitored and watched like a hawk when it had bitten, lunged or tried to attack numerous people?

I just don't get it.  Just thinking about it makes me tired.

I have 2 friends (with non-ACDs) who have dogs that are (to me) ticking time-bombs.  The dogs have to muzzled 100% of the time when they are anywhere people might be.  One of my friend's dogs is very sick and has to be under full sedation so the vet's staff can monitor him.

I get a crabby snap when the dog is in a lot of pain; heck, I snap too when I'm in pain.  I get the "Ooops, mistake" bite too.  It happens.  Dogs bite. I'm just wondering why all the effort for dogs that are never, ever going to live even close to a "normal" life.

What's makes this even more ironic is both these folks are 100% all positive  trainers.  I'm not dissing all-positive training.  Artie was trained AP.  But what is the point of having personal dogs that can't be left with anyone or any place?

With all the good, easy, nice, "balanced" dogs out there in rescue and in shelters, why (quite frankly) waste years on a dog that will never get better?

I just don't get it.

Pit Bull Freak Out? Not Me!

As I was waiting for basement workmen to come to the house, a lady in an SUV came driving by. "Have you seen a dog running loose?" 
"No, what does he look like?" 
"Brown with a white face," then tentatively, hesitantly, tearfully, "He kind of looks like a pit bull....??" She's in tears, "He's our baby!" 
"I have lots of pittie friends, no worries!!! I've worked with the bullies before. Let me get my guys in here to work, and I'll help you look for him." I even tell the Spousal Unit to keep an eye out for a lost dog. The lady gives me her name and number. She's shaking and in tears; her kid is manfully holding back his tears. About 20 minutes later, she drives by. "We found him!! He was just down the street!" Thank goD! I felt kind of good that I wasn't one of the Freak Outs when I heard the words "Pit Bull...."

"Leadership" Gets A Bad Rap

It's become a greatly misused term: Leader Of The Pack. So many people who are using positive training techniques get a big old hard-on when they hear that term. "Oh, you must be the Anti-Christ, you're the Leader Of The Pack!"  For folks who are advocating All Positives in training your critters, you sure get All Punchy when that phrase comes up.  Which part is that gets you? "Leader" or "pack?"  Trust me: the phrase was not coined or invented by Cesar Millan.

On the opposite side, "You MUST be the dominant leader of your dog pack or the entire universe will split on its axis and destroy itself because the dogs will go wild and kill us all!"  That's pretty stupid too, seeing as how the human-dog relationship has been around for millennia.

OK, so dogs aren't wolves. Science has debunked that whole wolf thing.  Thank God they aren't. Can we please give it a rest?

But suppose you have more than one dog?  Say you have five dogs? What the heck are you supposed to call them?  A Bark of Dogs? No? Then will someone please come up with a word for a group of dogs?  Like a gaggle of geese or a trumpet of swans.  For now, if you have more than two dogs, let's just face it. It's a pack of dogs.  It's a loosely formed group who get their resources from the same source.  If you go to the refrigerator, five dog faces will probably be close by. Anyone who says there isn't a loosely formed, often fluctuating hierarchy among your dogs isn't very observant.  You are NOT going to get rid of the word "pack."

You are not going to get rid of the word "leader" either. You are not going to change etymology overnight. Would it calm the AP community down if the term Leader of my Group (of animals) or Group Guide were used? The term "guardian" is almost too P.C. for my taste.  A Flock Guardian will kill to protect her flock.  Do you think a Ovcharka* invites the wolf threatening her livestock in for a cup of tea? When I think of being my dog's "guardian" I somehow envision myself as a slightly overweight Lara Croft with hip holsters over my Spanx and everyone is The Enemy. When I think of being my dogs' leader or guide, I picture my much skinnier self atop some glorious peak, my trusty canine side-kicks with me.  We've hit one of the summits of training.  We've taken the beachhead, together.  I taught them and they, in turn, taught me. But it had to start somewhere.  My dogs just didn't wake up one day, look at me and say, "Today I shall do complicated maneuvers while I stay by your left knee.  Ah, look at the elevated plank.  I know I must always touch the yellow part."  It began with me deciding to guide or lead my dog to "get" that's what I want.  I can to do that in positive way.

All Positive advocates wonder why they feel like they're swimming upstream against the Leader of the Pack theory.  You wonder why more people, especially men, aren't harkening to your clarion call of click-treat. "We have M&Ms, come hither!"  It's because the first thing so many of you is get all funky with the phrase "leader" because some poor sod has watched Cesar Millan or was told to do stuff the "old" dominant way. Too many of you trot out the latest article on how dogs aren't wolves and therefore the pack mentality is debunked.  Fine. Or you spend a while justifying positive training, like it's some incomprehensible weird cult of the absurd. Or, and worst of all, there is a sense of superiority.  "Ah, you poor misguided, inhumane dog owner.  You haven't been inducted into the Clicker Clique. I have the magic touch and you don't."  People don't want a damn lecture.  They don't need the science behind it.  They don't need Pavlovian theories. They have some crazy-ass dog that is running or ruining their lives and they need help, guidance, foreseeable, hands-on solutions NOW.  They need Leadership. Grab the clicker and show them!

If you really want to attract more people away from the "old" ways, especially men, you have to show results.  That if you do this process consistently, this good result will happen, and often very quickly.  I'm no expert dog trainer.  I don't have a bunch of letter behind my name.  But I'm not afraid to hand off my personal dog with a clicker and treats and let the person give it a whirl after I give them a few basics. My dogs will help them understand it a whole lot faster than me handing them a copy of Don't Shoot The Dog.

I personally don't mind being a director or guide or principle player -- which are also parts of the dictionary definition of Leadership.

I think you do have to create, help, guide or direct your dog to have appropriate behavior so s/he can be a nice companion, household member, team-mate etc. That doesn't mean alpha rolls, leash jerks or other "negative" stuff either.  I've got news: if you are click/treating your dog or cat or chicken to create a certain behavior; guess what, Skippy?  You are guiding them, you are the director in this little mini-play of training.

"Here is a box.  Now I shall click-treat when you do something to or near the box that I like or want to capture.  I will build on your interaction with the box until the final result is something I like." It's like improv theater in some respects.  "Here is your prop. Make something up and I will laugh or applaud when I like it or get what you're trying to convey."  You are, in a word, a leader.  Dogs (and cats) are watching you, reading your body language all the time.  Is she happy, sad, tired, mad?  What is the Human Food Provider up to?

Yes, even cats are observing us as they plot to take over the world.

I seriously don't want my dogs to be wild heathens, going wherever they want; not house-trained, biting everyone left and right, not coming when they're called etc. I have rules: no toys on the furniture, teeth do not touch human flesh, chasing the cat is not in the Fun Program curriculum.  That's not unreasonable, at least for me.  I want my dogs to look to me somewhat for "Is this ok?" (thinking and a form of trust) or "Hey, mom, I'm nose-butting you because there's something up," (alert) instead of going off half whacked. It's like kids: you don't give them some kind of rules and structure, they are going to turn into total obnoxious brats. Any adult with two brain cells to rub together has witnessed that.

I like to think of myself as a kindly, benevolent, loving, providing Lady of the Manor. "I adore you but there are some things that shall not be tolerated.  I will give you alternatives to undesired behavior, encouragement and guidance as to what is good and acceptable in my little corner of the universe.  I will seek wise and kindly counsel to help you achieve.  I will not starve you, beat you, mistreat you although I might holler at you now and again because I'm human and imperfect."

Why does the All Positive dog training community go off like 1960s anti-war protesters at an Abby Hoffman rally when people bring up "rules, structure, leadership?"

"Hell, no, we won't go!"

Come on, seriously, what would happen if you used any of those words? You'd be immediately sucked into a Cesar Millan-induced vortex and never be heard from again? Please.  Get a grip. Being a "leader" does not automatically make you a bullying, string-'em-up-high Hitlerian dog person. Calling your bunch of dogs a "pack" does not make you stupid, behind-the-times, unkind or unaware.

Work with the words people know and kind of understand. Don't theorize. Show them, hands on. You'll attract a lot more folks to the kinder, more humane way of training and interacting with their dogs if they see the light at the end of the tunnel.

*(I bet some of you looked that up....)

Throwback Thursday: Hart and True

Throwback Thursday: my first cattledog,

2004.  Hiking with Hart, age 11.

Hart-Marie (Allegra Thief of Hearts, CD, CGC, TDI, 1993-2009. Parents: Ch. Indian Creek True of Allegra, CGC, TDI x Ch. Longacres Blue Gem).

Even after, my ex and I split and Hart was done getting her CD, she was her dad's beloved buddy for almost 14 years.  I babysat her and saw her often.

True aka "Tooey"

The other pictures is of True, Hart's dad, who lived with us for about 18 months and then went back to his breeder's at their request. He had PRA, went blind and was PTS, as I understand it.

Loved both these dogs.

I still think about "Tooey" and miss him. He really started the whole cattledog thing for me because I just thought he was such a magnificent dog.  Silly, steadfast, sensible, mellow, great herder, great hiker, loved water, wonderfully patient with little kids, excellent judge of people and potentially dangerous situations, he was the only working Therapy dog I've had to date. His basic temperament, with a little more "dog friendly" thrown in is my benchmark temperament.  

2007

Hart had successful double cataract surgery at age 11.
Even at the end of her life, when her body was very old and frail and her back end didn't work anymore, Hart was always happy to be with you and lay on your lap.  She's even try a few tricks for you if she could. Her spirit and love were still going strong; her body just gave out.  I think my ex (bless his heart) kept her alive a bit too long but finally even he couldn't stave off the inevitable.

She was the best hiking dog I've ever owned; with my new rescue boy now coming in a close second. She spent most of her life hiking in the CV National Park, logging hundreds of miles a year. Even after age 10, she still could easily do a 10 mile hike, at age 15 could do an easy mile.

She always traveled like a dream and logged literally thousand of miles traveling with her dad all throughout Canada where she was a welcome guest at many a pub.

She completed her CD with a 196 score and was highest scoring Herding breed in all Obedience trials the day she finished.

I've loved all my dogs for different reasons and oddly I see a little bit of all of them in Artie the rescue. He's got some pretty big paws to fill.

Here's to happy memories of all your dogs who have left pawprints on your heart.  Especially those who corralled into the Cattledog Circle.

Your Adorable Puppy? Welcome To Teenaged Dog Hell!

Someone on one of the cattledog groups wrote:

"I just want to share something for new puppy parents: When you see and read the stories on here of all the wonderful, well behaved, well trained, and awesome adult dogs that most have, and you wonder how they all "lucked" out and won the dog lottery- KNOW THIS: most of us wanted to KILL our little adorable pups when they were 4 months old. I personally lost half a bookcase of old books, 5 pairs of shoes, almost all my socks, two expensive rugs, a floor-stand antique mirror, and countless hours off my life due to blood vessels popping in my head. So remember, when looking at photos, you will look back and forget all that stuff when you see cute photos of your baby when he/she was a puppy. THEY GROW OUT OF IT. "

4-8 months, horrible, horrible, horrible time!  Sometimes it lasts into their first year.

Horrible!!!

Did I say horrible?  I meant horrible. Horrible with a capital Hor.

House training my last one, Artie, was a nightmare! I would get on FB and cry out to my friends. I'd sob on the phone to other dog people.  What the hell had I gotten myself  IN TO?  What was I thinking?  I'm too old for this.

I've had cattledogs since 1993, you think I'd have some kind of handle on it.

Oh, no!

He wasn't my first dog or cattledog either and I always seem to win the Dog Pooping Lottery because I never get to do that part in summer or fall.  Oh, no. Dead of winter.

Artie was a horrible, horrible puppy.

AND he got car sick!  What cattledog gets CARSICK??  He didn't get carsick with his foster mom. I was so stressed about that I almost got carsick.  I'd sit in the car on the way to dog classes, shaking, my heart hammering in my chest, my ears tuned to that "rrrrap-bleech-gack" sound.

His one saving grace: he was (and is) a social butterfly. He's whip-smart, funny and has a real zest for life.  He loves to swim.  He has a lovely combination of ON and OFF. He's the best hiking dog I've had in years. I adore him.

I had another one (Dru) for 6 months in 1999 I was working with (6-12 months old), he was the worst chewer I ever had.  I had him tethered to me, right by my leg, and he silently almost chewed the table leg right by me in half.  I never heard it, never felt it. He tore up and annihilated linoleum floor tiles etc. When I got him, his former owner had allowed him to poop and pee in the crate, dirtiest dog I've ever known.  Yes, Virginia, you CAN stuff a 50 pound ACD into a pretty damn small crate. He got through the horrible house-training thing but that was 3 weeks, (almost 24/7) of utter hell.

His one saving grace: he was a social butterfly, used to run with 5 Greyhounds and a Borzoi. Coolest thing you ever saw: a cowdog herding sight hounds!

Elke, our "found pupp" was another horrible chewer and dis-embowler of All Things With Stuffing.  And she had the extra bonus of being completely disinterested in playing fetch or any game for that matter.  Oh, and for an extra-extra bonus, she was (and still is to a great extent) 40 pounds of pull-you-off-your-feet.  My slightly deformed hand is thanks to Elke's pulling me off my feet and dislocating 3 fingers.  But wait, there's more.  She tends to be dog fear-aggressive too!  Which can be anything from a low growl to going after another dog to shrieking, whining and spinning!  Wheeeee, fun for the entire family!

Her saving grace is her complete and utter mesmeric ability to suck you in to her lair of sweetness.  Her coat is like velvet.  You pet her and your heart rate begins to lower.  Her eyes are limpid, brown pools; her kisses are softer and sweeter than a summer garden. People come to meet Artie; they stay for Elke.

The one thing I thank my lucky stars for is I have never had a dog in the last 20 years that wasn't ok in the crate.  I personally can't cope with that, separation anxiety or severe aggression.

I know they say you don't always get the dog you WANT but you get the dog you NEED many times.  Really?  Somewhere in the Great Cosmic Book of Life, it was written: "Mia needs the puppy from hell.  Not once, not twice, but we're going to give her that canine gift that keeps on giving."

Artie was the first all positive trained dog I've ever owned. Interesting process for all of us and continues to be.  But he really has turned into such an awesome dog in so many ways.  It must be like child birth I guess.  You know there was pain but it seems slightly dimmed.

God help me, I'm thinking about adding a third at some point.....the Gods will lead us in the right directions.  I'm a big believer in Fate.  And that they have a really sick sense of humor at times.

Puppies.  Simply Adorable!  There are not enough adjective or superlatives for puppies.

Teenaged dogs?  A new dimension of the depths of hell....Dante couldn't make up this stuff. If he did, there would be an Eighth Dimension of hell.

Epic Dog Owner Fail

I wondered what the dogs were crunching on. 

I thought it was an ice chip...then I dawned on me, they haven't been outside in 2 hours.

Now I know.

"All Positives" Can Be Intimidating

I really hate those Grumpy Gus/sies giving me the stink eye at an Obedience event. Really? Wow, I expect that in the breed ring but at Obedience, Rally, Agility???

I am frankly rather intimidated by “Force Free” training even though I’ve used it with my herding-breed dog since I got him…..and I’ve known about it for over 15 years…..and for a very odd reason….

Mind you,, I’m not advocating forced training here. I had a dog years ago I did really well in Novice with (using luring mostly, very few mild corrections — ever) but she would not retrieve because it had been forced on her. The Ancient Method. You don’t want to know.

Here is where All-Positive or Force Free gets intimidating and it’s not just me. I’ve talked to other “novices.”

So much of it is based on timing: Correct Timing. You always hear about Timing and Accuracy! Now, I have a vision limitation which creates about a .5 to almost 2 second delay in either (or both) the click (or tongue click or Yesss!) and/or the treat delivery.

In other words, I want the dog to, say, give paw. My dog has offered me a slight paw thing and I’ve missed the proverbial boat by a mile. “Oh, yes, I DID see that!” Click!! Ah, but it’s not for the paw thing. He’s gone beyond that.

Thus, oftentimes, my dogs look at like me like I’m gone crazy. I end up feeling frustrated and feeling seriously sorry for two bright, willing canines whose mom just says, “It ain’t happening, kids. Sorry: bad mom! I’ll settle for you all to be reasonably civilized. I know ignoring the cat is not in the cards. And that Novice/Rally thing? Oh, well…..”

I’ve talked to a few AP trainers about this so they know that’s my particular “fault”. Seriously, picture me at Chicken Camp?? “The chicken did WHAT? When??” It could be amusing…and I think amusing is sorely needed in training.

I think a lot of people are so truly afraid they’re either going to get it “wrong” and establish an unwanted behavior or that they’ll NEVER get that wanted behavior — that it will literally take years. And years. If you’re like me and you grew up in horses, you were probably taught that 90% of unwanted behavior or bad performance is squarely on the rider’s shoulders. So if the dog “screws up,” you mentally flail yourself.

We all see a lot of good obedience runs from folks who either use force or a combination of treats and corrections. So you think, well, that’s the way to go because a lot of them are high scorers/winners etc.

The other thing is, and I know this is weird too — but more men are needed who use Force Free. They need to be in the spotlight. Women seem to “get it” and do it, at least in the spotlight. Think of the really big AP dog trainers: you, Sophia Yin, Karen Pryor, Kikopup on YouTube etc. etc. Ladies all.

Believe me, I always recommend AP or FF as the way to go when people ask me. And my younger dog has only been trained that way. I can certainly see where using force was a big detriment to my older dog and I’ll regret that to my dying day.

I just think being intimidated by the whole thing, thinking it is going to take FOREVER to compete for a certain title or working with people who have certain limitations needs to be addressed..

Just saying —- 

Artie's First PetSmart Visit

Art, Nov. 12, 2013

Artie says: Auntie Martha took Mom and me to the dog park on Bath Rd. There was another cattledog/BC cross there, a female, named Cookie.  She doesn't like people, her dad said, but boy, she wanted me to play with her!  She barked at me and play-bowed at me and chased me and THEN (when she was pooped) I chased HER!!  Mwah!

There were some other doggies there too, we were all about the same size!  I had fun!

The black doggie's owner was really freaked out because she thought I was hurting her dog, but the black dog jumped on me hard and grabbed my tail!  Ouch!  She was very bossy!  She also had a toy which Mom told me I could NOT have.  I didn't grumble, I just put my mouth on her neck by her face then she stopped being stupid and we were friends.  I think she might have been more like the puppies we had.

Mom is pretty smart and she listens because she can't always see stuff. She whistled for me the minute she heard the other dog's barking and noises become different and I ran to her.  Mom told me I didn't need to fix it. But the black doggie's mom must not know doggie language as good as the other dog parents did!  So she took the black doggie away.

Mom kept walking around the park's edge so I would go and check on her and bump her leg with my nose. That's how I tell Mom something or let her know that I'm there. It was too cold for the humans to stand still but some of them were.

Then Auntie took me and Mom to this store with lots of smells!  OMG!  Mom said it was called PetSmart.  I've never been there before!  I got cookies from the people that worked there.  I took them very nicely!! There were other dogs there but Mom kept telling me how good I was (with her Happy Voice) even though she didn't have ANY treats with her!!!  I didn't even get silly with that one dog that screamed-barked when it saw me!  Wow, what a noise!!!

Then I got some french fries and when we got home home, Mom gave me and Elke a half a hamburger.  Why ELKE got part of the hamburger for staying home is beyond me.

No pictures (Mom forgot her phone) and no food...except the hamburger!
Mom said I was reallllly good!

(Mom adds: I have this dog for almost 2 years and just now I'm taking him to PetSmart??  He WAS realllly good. I'm glad I've been learning about dog body language.  All of the other owners seemed really nice and savvy, which is very pleasant. There was the black mix, the cattledog cross and 3 tan mixes.  I'm thinking that bumping thing Artie does might come in handy and that I could reward that behavior.  I'm just not sure how that would come in handy.)

Too Many Cattledogs In Shelters?

I have gotten my cattledogs from responsible breeders, a breed rescue and a shelter.  I have also (briefly) fostered one.

A good point was made that yes, an abundance of ACDs in shelter are geographical.  For instance, in S. Ohio, you'll see many more than say in NE Ohio.

Also, it must be taken into consideration: different shelters have different criteria.
Some take owner surrenders.
Some automatically kill a certain type, look, age of dog.
Some are so antiquated that they kill black animals automatically, because statistics have shown that all black cats and dogs are the last to get adopted.
Some take the stray off the street.
Some only take abused, abandoned and neglected animals.

My Artie is from such a shelter and he is the only obviously purebred ACD under a year (he was 3-4) months they have gotten in ANYONE'S memory (going back 13-14 YEARS!).  He was literally, a rarity and because I was a volunteer there AND had ACD experience they wanted me to have him.  (Lucky me).

Secondly: a lot of dogs that are being labeled ACDs  just aren't.  They are mixes of ACD and something else. Granted there ARE a lot of fine looking purebred ACDs out there, but I'm sorry, if it's mostly body spots, narrow headed, thin-tailed, weedy-legged, pale-eyed it's not my idea of a cattledog; wonderful doggy though it may be.

Third: A responsible breeder will ALWAYS, ALWAYS TAKE THE DOG BACK.  If they aren't dead, they'll take it back. They may, after watching it, caring for it, analyzing and consulting other trusted folks (vets, behaviorists, etc.) about it's behavior etc. rehab it, wisely, carefully rehome it or humanely euthanize it.

Responsible breeders keep track of all their dogs and all the ones I know have spay-neuter contracts.

A responsible breeder microchips their dogs and most hold co-ownership with any intact dogs they sell, say for show.  Twenty years ago, my first cattledogs were tattooed.

When I owned a dog bred by the late, great Deb Clark, if WE (she and us) had decided to ever breed him (which we never did) she had the final say over who he would be bred to, as she knew bloodlines better than I did.  When his hips came back OFA fair, we decided to not pass that on and neutered him.  He was a champion of record and that was enough.

Very rarely does some responsible breeder's baby end up in a high kill shelter.  And boy, if it does, there's going to be hell to pay!

A good breeder doesn't just breed 2 litters a year to the same bitch.

A good breeder has AT LEAST TWICE as many approved homes for even the largest litter they'll produce.

A good breeder doesn't over-breed their bitch either.

A good breeder almost always DOES breed rescue; they help breed rescue in some manner, way, shape or form.

For many of you reading this, The Hershey puppy mill bust where so many ACDs were found is a faint memory.  Note this: ACD people from all over the area converged to help those dogs. Two years ago, over 200 Rottweilers were found in Texas in horrific conditions.  ARC (the national breed club) and devotees of Rotts from all over the country and even Canada banded together to save those dogs. These were BREEDERS and show people for the most part, folks.

If we put a moratorium on breeding:
A) we lose the breed
B) you will never, ever stop BYB*.  Ever.

Can we stop puppy mills?  Absolutely. And yes, it's horrible that even one dear ACD ends up in a shelter.  Yes, the numbers are appalling.  6,000 estimated is too much.

But look at all the Chihuahuas inundating shelters in California, tens of thousands of them are killed every year.

And pits or pit types???  Those poor dogs?  Talk about crappy breeding!  So many of them have bad legs, bad backs, horrible teeth, skin conditions, mental screws loose.  That's what BYB and money grabbers have done, just in the last 15-20 years, to American's Dog, The Nanny Dog, the dog breed that gave us Sgt. Stubby, the most decorated dog in US military history, still. If you talk to responsible breeders of APBTs and AmStaffs, those people have such a tight grasp on where their pups go it puts most ACDs breeders to shame (and that takes some doing.) Plus they must fight the daily onslaught of idiot bully owners and Breed Specific Legislation (BSL), an evil which even touches our beloved herding breeds.

Do not blame the responsible **COE breeder. Talk to them instead.

Rescues, Kennel clubs, National, Area and State breed clubs MUST learn to work together to help dogs and help owners who are overwhelmed, need help with training, in financial difficulties, have severe health issues etc.  We all need to remember that this is not necessarily a "dog problem", this is mainly a "people problem."  If we all band together, instead of flailing each other (and rescue groups are NOTORIOUS for infighting and flailing) miracles can and do happen.


*BYB: Back Yard Breeders
** COE: code of ethics

Men Wanted

One Person's Experience With Cesar Millan

Good article, thank you to my friend for sharing.

I think something that NO ONE ever mentions is CM seems to be particularly appealing for men.

I am NOT dissing men (I'm married to a wonderful one) but I have heard of so many folks who have a "ruined" dog because their male partner watched Cesar and it "just made sense."

What positive training needs DESPERATELY are more MALE voices out there, posting, holding seminars (yes, I know about Ian Dunbar...), appealing to men and how a lot of men's brains work: goal oriented, needs to be fixed NOW!

Most of the AP trainers out there are WOMEN! In my area, I can't think of one guy.  Lots of fabulous women of course.

Clicker training, all-positives, Anti-Cesar...however you want to phrase it....needs more MALE voices.

Maybe if more clicker classes. seminars came with beer, BBQ and brauts and a guy saying and showing this is all going to work...we'd not see events like that being clustered with females.

Ladies with dogs/cats/horses etc. have you EVER tried to get your Significant Male Other to attend a clicker/All-Positive class or a seminar?

"Dr. Sophia Who???  What the hell....uh....Honey, I'll pay for you, YOU go. I'm going golfing/sailing/gaming/hunting/gardening/lawn-mowing/doing-nothing-in-it's most-violent-form."

And if we had more guys attending, training etc. AP it would be more (eeek....I'm using one of those CM words) balanced, wouldn't it?

Never A Dull Moment! (Aug. 2013)

From the Never A Dull Moment files:
I was at an adoption event in Orville, Ohio for some LOVELY dogs and was taking a break outside the pet shop where the event was held.
Suddenly, there were two little dogs (about the size of Jack Russel) one white and one black running loose!  And scared, especially the black one who OBVIOUSLY had babies as her poor bags were almost to the ground.
Luckily for those 2 little dogs there were a ton of people who A) do rescue B) train dogs and/or C) know a lot about dogs!  I had a pocket of freeze dried litter (which by the way I never carry...have to get some of that dog-crack), and began tearing pieces and tossing them to the little dogs while sitting on the ground.  The white one was in my lap almost immediately, grabbing at the food.  The black one was much more skittish, poor baby. Eventually she too came up.  Both dogs ate the liver like they hadn't eaten in DAYS!
My trainer friend, Jennifer got loop leads around them and someone had called the police, who came very quickly.  (Small town)
Yes, someone had reported their dogs missing!
The little dogs wouldn't get into the back of the squad car so I did, urging them with treats.
Kelsey has the incriminating evidence of me in the back of a squad car. (LOL, not the first time although i don't ever remember hard plastic seats....).
Everyone was so on their game, quiet, calm yet with a sense of urgency and helpfulness. the cop seemed nice actually.
I hope those little dogs are OK, poor darlings.
I'm kind of surprised that all my "training" over the years kicked in immediately but I sure am glad I wasn't by myself!
Not by a long shot.
Merely one of the players.
It was actually one of "those moments" when you do darn near everything right and you kind of feel proud of yourself!

The Dogs' View: The Wagon

Artie: I heard Mom in the kitchen, fussing about and clicking something.  Not the Clicker Something but her belt thing (Spibelt) that she wears a lot. This means she's probably going somewhere. I heard her reach for something by the door to Our Place.  Oh, oh, oh, I think she's going for a harness.....wait for it.....

Elke: OHMYGOD, HARNESS, HARNESS!  LEASH! LEASH!!!  MOAN-GROAN-GRUNT-SQUEeeeeAL!  I CAN'T STAND IT!!!!!!!

Artie: God, Elke, really?  How old are you again?

Elke: OHMYGOD, SHE HAS MYYYYY HARNESS! OMG, OMG, OMG!  I'M SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!

Artie: Oh, oh, she has MY harness too!!!!!!  Yippeee!

Elke: OHMYGOD, GATE, GATE, GATE, MUST GO OUT GATE!!!!  I'M SOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!  GATE!  OUT!
What?  I have to get BACK???  Mom has to go first?  Oh, god, I can't stand it!
Moooooaannnnn-grunt-grunt-moan!

Artie: Hey Princess Superior,  check it out. Mom is holding YOUR leash!   She doesn't have to hold MINE.  I stay with her!
Oh, nothing from the peanut gallery???
Yeah, go ahead, give me the stink eye.
So....anyway.....She attached the other end of our leash to my harness front so we are on the same leash.  Mom says it's easier than do all it that way than the leashes-tangled-up-two-dogs thing.
We wear a special harness called a Freedom Harness.

Elke in her Freedom Harness last year. 

Now humans name stuff the darnedest things.  "Freedom," my Aunt Fanny! Freedom means running around, jumping in the water, stuff like that.   Anyway, you can attach a leash to the top or the front or both. It's a nice harness.  Mom really likes it. I know when I see the harness something's going to happen!!!!
Elke is sniffing like crazy.  I mean like she's sniffing her brains out.  Like Evil Vacuum Cleaner.
We walked to the place with the slide-out box that gives treats to us (the bank) and then we start to walk home. We go down a street I don't think I've been to before and Mom sees a girl on a bike trying to pull her brother in a wagon.

Mom: (This does not bode well: kids, bike, wagon....This could be a lot of fun or a train wreck....it's looking like a train wreck.....Yep, it's a train wreck.....) You need a rope!

Girl: He hurt his knee and I'm trying to get him to my uncle's house. You're too heavy! (accusingly to kid in wagon)

Elke: I've calmed down now.  I've sniffed......

Artie...yeah, like the neighborhood went up your nose....

Elke: .....I've pooped.  I'm good. Hi kids!

Artie: KIDS!??  Whoa, kids!!!!

Elke: Mom looped our leash through the handle of the wagon. Then she put the leash on to the top of our harnesses. She clicked her tongue, not the Treat Sound but ck-ck-ck and made kissy noises!
     "C'mon guys, pull-pull-pull!  Ck-ck-ck!  Good dogs!  Good girl, Schmooby!  Good boy, Blooby!"  (She was using her Happy Voice.) Mom had her hand on the handle to steer it, and make sure it didn't run into our butts but oh, we were pulling the wagon.  Brat Boy was a little weirded out at first so I did most of the work......

Artie: Yeah, that thing behind me making noise was a little weird but Mom kept saying I was good!

Elke: ....Then he finally got his act together.  We pulled the wagon down the street, passed about ten houses, turned left, passed a few houses, turned right and then turned left into a driveway.  Some guy on his porch hollered, "Hey, that's the way to do, that's pretty cool, you go, dogs, great idea!" (I think he'd had a few beers.)
We finally arrived at the house and the girl was sooooooo nice and thanked us and pet us very gently.  Blooby wasn't even a brat!  Amazing.
Mom said, "See you don't need a sled dog!  These guys can do it just fine!"
The little boy never thanked us.  Brat. Mom changed our leash back to the front part of our harnesses and made us walk nicely home. No pulling!  It feels different when the leash is on TOP!
The rest of the way home Mom told us how good we were!

Us by New Car. It doesn't have a name yet. 

We came in the house and Mom took off our harnesses.  I collapsed on the floor and Brat Boy slept on the pillow!  Mom said we really earned our dinner tonight.

Artie: Don't we always?

Elke: Whatever.

Artie's Day July 5, 2013

Artie: I had a huge day yesterday. I'm still exhausted!

My Auntie Gayle took us to the shelter yesterday where I was adopted from. I don't remember being there. I was there only a day maybe and then I went to live with Momma Jen, the Rotten-weilers and Uncle Shay the collie.  Then I went Mom and Dad's house. 

Anyway!!

There is a doggie day care there, so Mom to me there to have play time while she messed about with shelter dogs. She had lots of smells on her when she picked me up. The place is called Hattie Larlham (In Twinsburg, OH) and employs people with mental disabilities. But I don't care!  

The head guy told me and Auntie that I did really well and they said, "He can come back ANY time!" Mom was really happy, because as a Cattledog Mom she hasn't heard this a lot cuz it doesn't happen all the time. The Others who came before me could be real bossy with other dogs. Some of us cattledogs are pretty bossy!

Then we went to my cousins' house Oreo, McKinley and I hung out there for a couple of hours.

Waiting for Uncle Ray to come home.....I don't need to lay on no stinkin' towel!

Kinners really likes his butt scratched!

I play with Oreo and then I play with McKinley!  This is how it goes when I am there.....

Then we all went (along with other doggie friend, Dudley) for a very hot, humid, muddy, slippery long walk (6-8 miles) through the woods. Up and down hills, lots of roots and rocks and slippery stuff, through streams and mud.  I don't care because I'm a dog!  I like the water part. I was a little worried at the pond where the Bad Thing happened but I went in and out with Kinners so eventually it was ok. 

I think Dudley got stung by a skeeter; there were a lot of skeeters. All the humans were sweating a lot.  Dudley won't go into the water like Oreo, Kinners and I do.  He doesn't like it but that's ok!  Oreo dips himself, it's funny!  I know Mom was really tired but it's GOOD for her.  We went back to O&M's house and I got a BATH!!!!!!  Eeeeuuuuu! 

(Yawn...) Ya know.....I...think...I might....be....a little....bit......Zzzzzzzzzzz.......

Mom: Can you believe it, I think he's STILL tired!

Artie getting some loving from Honorary Mom, Auntie Gayle.

I truly hope his sweet, goofy, social nature continues as he matures. I really love his temperament!

When you adopt a dog, even one as young as he was (3.5-5 months), It's a crap-shoot. You have no idea where he came from. How he was raised. A lot of it IS nurture (I think) but nature is definitely in there. I'm thrilled beyond measure at what a nice boy he is and I think we've "done right" by him as owners/trainers. He does get the occasional verbal "Hey!" and "What the he-- are you doing?" and "Knock it off!" but all the rest of his training has been "all positive." Praise, clickers, treats, tug/fetch rewards, luring, shaping etc.

He'll be 2 in September.

Classes and Training Help: L'Chaim Canine.

It Isn't Just A Pit Bull Thing. Cattledogs Get It Too!

OK, OK, I know. A lot of my friends have or work with or volunteer for Pitbull type dogs.  Two of Artie's bestest friends are pit-type dogs.

The Spousal Unit with Kinners: two guys hangin' out.

Oreo: he's down with that!  Artie loves him!

The boys check out Co
usin Artie

So yes, we have contact with many "big heads."  And we love our pit-type friends.  We hear the stories, the misconceptions, the comments about them.

I've been a lot of places where there are dogs and now because of my exposure to pit-types, I don't have any pre-conceived notions.  It's a dog with a (usually) square head, period. I ask if I can pet etc. just as I would with any dog.  And I've done events with a pit-type on my arm, so to speak, and have educated and advocated for them for years now.

I think I've heard darn near every comments a person can make about pit-type dogs and I'm here to tell you, it runs the gamut from "Awesome" to "Satanic."

I've heard, "You can't trust 'em, not one of 'em," to "Best damn dog my family ever had!"

What is fascinating to ME, personally, is for as many bad or  fearful stories that people tell, I've heard an almost equal amount of curious, respectful questions to misty-eyed memoirs to powerful stories of love and loyalty.

I can honestly say (if the locale is pretty neutral) that the nice comments or questions run about anywhere from 40-75% of what I've heard if the dog I'm with is a nice, mellow dog or goofy, happy dog.

The negatives just seem louder than the neutrals and positives.

Now folks who have pit types wail and gnash (rightly so) about how misunderstood their dogs are.  They are.  I'm not saying they're NOT!  BSL, extreme prejudice, unnecessary killings and incarcerations. Pit type owners have every right to feel, nay, be paranoid, vigilant and on guard. If you're on a Pit Group on Facebook or you know folks who have them or work with them, this is nothing new. It's an exhausting round of educating John Q. Stupid-Public.

However, you're not the only ones.

We have (for those of you who don't know us) a lovely female mix and an Australian Cattledog (ACD). He will be 2 in Sept. 2013 and his name is Artie or "Blooby" as he is most often known.  (Blame the S.U. on that.)

Artie is my 7th (including fosters) ACD. This is my 20th year with cattledogs.

Brief synopsis for the uninitiated: An ACD (sometimes known as a Blue Heeler, Queensland Heeler or Heeler) is a medium sized herding dog breed, originating in (who'd a-thunk?) Australia!  They come in blue or red (plus blue or red speckle).  They were bred to herd and guard feral cattle in the outback.  They are also used on sheep and other stock, including reindeer! They are very smart, pretty biddable (I think) and tough. They have teeth (scissor bite) which they use to herd stock with, often nipping at the heels of recalcitrant cows. Thus the name "heelers." They are often called "velcro" dogs because they want to know what you're up to at any given moment.
They are athletic and sturdy with a weather-resistant coat. They should have upright ears and tight "cat feet."
They are loyal to their humans but often diffident to down-right suspicious of strangers. They often are not tolerant of other dogs.  They need a ton of positive socialization. They have a lot of energy, although I have had a few that were pretty laid back. (That's not the norm.) They are a "busy" dog but I think there are many dogs that are far busier.  They love brain and/or body work and excel in a wide variety of dog sports.  At 17-20 inches, it's an easy size to live and travel with.

Artie has some of the best qualities of his breed and of a companion dog in general.  We're very, very blessed.

ACDs are also an extremely unusual LOOKING dog. Once you know what a cattledog looks like (or SHOULD look like) you can honestly say, "Yep, that's a cattledog!"   They are pretty unforgettable!

(I have to preface this by telling you I live in the Midwest.)

Here are some of the "usual" comments who someone has met Artie (or any of my other cattledogs.)

"Wow, what kind of mix is THAT?"
"Man, how old IS your dog?" (This only seems to happen with blues; must be the grey hairs in the coat.)
"Does that dog have WOLF in him?"
"Is that a little German Shepherd?" (I never know where people get that from.)
And startlingly close to the truth) "Is that a (part) Dingo?"

Once in a while (and it's getting to be more commonplace than it was 20 years ago) you hear:

"Is that one of them blue heelers?"  This is often said in the same semi-suspicious tone as many a pit type owner has heard.  "Is that one of them pit bulls?"

Now, OK, all right, call me grammatically biased but the minute someone (no matter what city or state I'm in) says "them heelers" or "them there heelers" or even 'them cattledogs," (yes Virginia, some people DO get it right), my intellectual-snobbery-hackles start rising up.  Even when someone say "those cattledogs" with the emphasis on "those," I inwardly cringe.  I'm sure pit type folks do too.

"Oh, God, here we go. And it's not going to good."

Here's where the pit type folks and the cattledog folks diverge. With a pit type on the other end of your leash, you COULD ostensibly B.S. your way through that query especially if your dog is black, brindle or fawn colored.  I've heard lab-boxer mix, hound-boxer mix, poodle-terrier mix (yes, we had one of those of the Humane Society) etc. etc.  John Q. Stupid couldn't pick out a pure-bred American Pit Bull Terrier out of a line-up!  Many experts can't either!

But if they've identified your ACD as a heeler or cattledog, yeah, you're pretty much sunk.  Here it comes, I think.  The Bad Cattledog Story. And it almost always begins with "My cousin" or "My friend had one of them."

It's usually a cousin. If it's a cousin, you know (9 out of 10 times) it's going to be bad.

Let's say, on a good week, you and your friendly, social dog meet 20 pretty neutral-to-nice people, all men.  In a good week, the pit type folks  might get 40% - 60%  neutral to positive reactions.  The rest, admittedly, are going to suck.

In that same week, the cattledog owner, meets 20 people (men) who guess (correctly) what he is. 17-19 of those people will say the following:

"Cool looking dog. You know....my cousin (insert other friend or relation) had one of them (there) dogs.  Meanest damn dog you ever saw. Bit everybody.  Loyal as hell but damn, was he ever mean!"  

Your heart does a little downward spiral because you know that yet another jerk owns an out-of-control, untrained (or badly trained) cattledog and is doing a huge disservice to the breed. Your brain goes slightly postal and you think with in inward sigh:

Educate. Again. It's a training exercise for my dog, meeting new people. Again.  I bet Lab/Pug/Fluffy Dog people don't go through this sh*t.

So, Pit type dog owners and lovers, you are not the only ones.  If you're out in public, cattledog people get this all the time.  All. The. Tine.

So do Rottweiler people.  And Doberman people. And German Shepherd people.

Perhaps it might comfort you folks with pit type dogs to know you're not alone.

First Night of Dog Class: Beyond CGC

Taking Artie to his first Beyond CGC class (all positives, L'Chaim Canine) showed me a couple of things:

1) he may be smarter than me. This is not surprising.
2) he sure as heck is faster than me.
3) he actually is starting to want to please me.
4) I need to work with him waaaay more. There's so much potential there!

Well, duh!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And now.....
From the dogs' point of view:

Elke: YOU LEFT ME BEHIND???? 

WTH??????!!!!  

ARRRGH!!!!!

WHINE!!!!!!!!! CRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SCREAMING IN CRATE!!!!!!!!!!!!



Artie: (blowing raspberries....) Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah!  

I went in a different car.  Aunt Kim's car!  I wanted to stick my head out the window, but noooooooo!  Stupid humans. 

Where are we going?  Oh, wait, this looooks familiar....it smells familiar   
   
I'm getting out of the car....I know where this is....dog class place!  Oooooh, bark-bark-bark-shrieking-high-bark! No, Mom, I don't want to shut up!  

There is another dog!  Hi Dog!!! hi, hi, hiya, dog!!!!  Oh, another dog!  Hiya dog! Why aren't you letting me say hi to the fluffy dog???  OK, we'll go sniff and I'll try and pee on things.  

OMG, Mom actually LET me lift my leg and didn't yell at me.  Until after the second time.  Then she told me to quit marking.  Stupid human....

Come on.....Let me pee on things....Oooooh, oooooh, I think I might gotta take a dump!  Yes, Mom, I heard you say "Go poopaloopa!"  

(Mom scooped up my poop.  Good Mom.  You remember a bag!)

We finally get to go into the building.  OMG, there are two of my FAVORITE HUMANS EVER!   Momma Jen and Auntie Kelsey!  Wheeeeee!!!  Bark, HI, Bark! Wiggle, jump on you!  

I'M SO EXCITED I CAN'T STAND MYSELF!!  

But they ignore me.  Fine. Be that way.  

The fluffy dog is there. I know he is.  I can smell him. But he's behind some blankets over an x-pen so I can't see him.  But I can see another dog, Roxie!  She is bigger than me.  Mom found out she is a young Greater Swiss Mt. Dog.  She's a baby, she's only 7 months old. 

Momma Jen talks human talk to our people, says what we're going to do in class, blah-blah-blah. The humans nod and listen. Training the humans is hard. 

 Mom has cheese so I'm kind of looking at her. The first thing we are supposed to do in class is look at our human's eyes and sit really close to them in their chair.  I can do that  I do that a lot at home.  Mom clicks her tongue when I do that and I know what that means: treat!!  We take a break and then this part gets confusing.  

Now I love my Mom and Dad and Elke.  (I'm not sure about that cat-thing...but his food is good!)  But sometimes I just don't know what Mom or Dad want me to do.  This is one of those times.  Mom is a slow poke.  I know she has food but what does she want me to do?  I turn my head to the right, click-treat.  Ok, I can do that!  Wait, I did it, where's my treat?  Do you want me to do that? No, wait, i moved my paw and you click-treated me.  Sh*t, what do I do now?  Turn my head, move my foot?  

I'M SO CONFUSED AND MY HUMAN IS SO DAMN SLOW!  

I need a break!  Aunt Kelsey gives me a tug toy (OMG!) and Mom and I go into a hallway away from the other dogs, so I can tug and play and be stupid and not upset anybody!  

I LOVE TUGGY!!!!  I love the whole growling, pulling mess of it all!  I love to make noises! 

We come back into the room and Mom holds out her hand.  What now?  I'm getting tired and my brain hurts.  I think I remember this one: Touch. But I'm not sure. Aunt Kelsey does it a few times with me and I kinda get it.  But I'm starting to look around the room.  Mom feels bad, I know she does.  She says, "I think he's done."  

Momma Jen says class is over and she will send our humans "assignments."  

What is an assignment and can you eat it? 

The other dogs leave and I get to be in the room loose and sniff while Mom helps put things away.  I smell where the fuzzy dog was. Then we got to Momma Jen's car and Mom puts me in a crate.  Wow, there are a TON of smells in here! Other dogs and stuff. I got home and go in the back yard.  Mom lets Elke out....

Elke: WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?????  Oooooooooh, there is a different car in the driveway.....I see a human....Oh, Hi, Momma Jen!  I love you, love you!

Artie: God, what a suck-up!  

The End.  For now.